Sunday, 8 June 2008

Welcome to the Village Idiot's Money

Two years ago I was a penniless drunk, employed as the local idiot in the village of Lower Proctologist, Hertfordshire, England.

They were happy times! But suddenly, two years ago, Mrs Currie from the post office left me £50,000 in her will, just for walking her dogs! Well, the next eighteen months were a whirlwind. It had always been my ambition to own a fruit and vegetable shop selling only amusingly shaped produce. I travelled the world collecting fruit and veg in the shape of parts of the human body, but when I got home, I left it all in the back garden and the rabbits got it.

So now I was broke again but in the last six months, I've been building up quite a steady income online. Starting tomorrow, I'm going to tell you all about it. As you can see from my picture, Farmer Truss gave me my old job back - scaring birds is in me blood see.

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